I Became A Father

I Became A Father

One of the purposes of marriage is to get offspring. How many people who are married really crave the presence of a child. There are those who after getting married the wife immediately gets pregnant, then the baby is born safely, there are also those who have been married for years but have not yet got offspring. Ironically there are those who are given the gift of children by the Almighty, but their children are thrown away, wasted or even killed. Even though children are our investment in the hereafter. In a hadith, the prophet Muhammad Sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam said about deeds that would not break the reward even though we had died one of them was a godly child who prayed for us as his parents. Then it is truly a loss if we have children but the child is actually wasted or not educated to be a godly child.

I am one of the lucky ones because God has given me offspring, thank God. And really amazing, so fast God gave me a child. Before I married my wife was menstruating, right on the wedding day my wife was not menstruating. A month later it turned out that my wife was not menstruating. Then my wife took a pregnancy test, the result was that she was positively pregnant. Allah is the Greatest. So soon God gave me the trust of a child. Pregnancy was a very hard time for my wife. My wife and I undergo long-distance relationships because I worked in another city. I usually went home every two weeks. My wife lived a fairly hard life, pregnant and far away from me. We know the condition of pregnant women, especially in the early days of pregnancy, frequent vomiting, appetite and others. Even my wife’s condition lasted for months, until the time of birth. At that time the Hajj season arrived. My parents left for Hajj. My mother hoped to leave Hajj with the first group so that when my wife gave birth she could accompany her. Qodarullah, my wife gave birth faster than expected.

Wednesday afternoon I left for the city where I worked. Thursday afternoon I got news from my sister if my wife was hospitalized. So on Friday morning I went home and went straight to the hospital. I arrived at the hospital on Friday afternoon. I got a story from my wife that yesterday she was sick, high heat. Then he went to the midwife because the midwife was worried about the condition of the baby in the womb of my wife so the midwife suggested that my wife was taken to the hospital. After being hospitalized the opposite condition happened to my wife and baby in her womb. If my wife’s condition improves, in contrast to the baby in my wife’s stomach, the baby’s condition declined. Finally, the doctor advised my wife to have a cesarean operation to take the baby. Sunday morning was the day of the operation. I, my sisters and my aunt waited outside the operating room. A moment later a baby crying. We were still waiting outside worriedly. Sometime later the doctor came out of the operating room and told us if the baby was born. Allahu akbar, thank God. Wow, amazing. Then the doctor asked me to report to the registration section. Immediately I ran to the registration section, I was asked by officers, the baby boy or girl? I’m confused because I didn’t know my son or daughter. Apparently so happy and happy, I forgot to ask the doctor, my son or daughter. Various feelings were mixed in me, this was how it felt to be a father. Even though there was a little worry because my child was born at the age of the womb which was only 7 months old. Yes, only 7 months. My child was born prematurely, a baby girl weighing only 19 ounces, was very small compared to other babies in a special baby room.

Do you have experience with premature babies?

When I Got Married

When I Got Married

Getting married is a means to legalize the relationship between a man and a woman. A man is forbidden from having a relationship with a woman who is not a mahram without a clear reason. In one verse, Allah forbids us from approaching adultery, because adultery is a very bad act. Approaching adultery alone should not let alone commit adultery, certainly more prohibited. The Prophet Muhammad also reminded us of approaching this adultery. He forbade a man to be alone with a woman who is not a mahram because surely Satan will tempt to do things that are forbidden. By marrying a man and woman’s relationship becomes lawful. After marriage men and women become mahram, they are free together everywhere, except to places that are forbidden, of course.

As I told you before, I got married on Sunday 12 April. Within a month or so of the first time I met the girl, I decided to marry her. Without dating and not much communication, let alone meet her. From the first acquaintance to before marriage I only met the girl twice, those were when I was acquainted and when I applied. I got married at the girl’s parents’ new home, a house that had just been built, a house that had never been occupied before. The wedding program was very simple. I went to the wedding venue with my family group on Sunday morning from home. There were my parents, my sisters and other families. The distance between my parents ‘house and the girl’s parents’ house was about 100 km. There was an event that was not heartening when traveling. I chose the wrong road, got into a dead end, was forced to turn back to the original road. Understandably, I haven’t memorized the way to the girl’s house. Finally, I arrived at the girl’s parents’ new home. A small, simple house, so it cannot accommodate a large number of guests present. The solemnization of marriage (ijab kabul) went smoothly, thank God. It was at the time of the blessing that I really saw what the girl was like, beautiful, masyaaAllah.

Sunday, April 12, at around 10 am, I officially became a husband. The dowry was a book, as the request of the girl. Alhamdulillah. The program was over, my family’s group had returned home, but many guests were still present until late in the afternoon. After delivering my family’s entourage, I returned to my new family. It felt strange, awkward, confused. Because only a few people I knew. Even with my own wife. The foreign woman who is now my wife. The moment of the first night I was still awkward, sleeping with her. I couldn’t sleep until morning. Then what did I do with my wife? We just chat, got to know each other. That was all. Really didn’t know what to do.
How about your first night?