When I Got Married
Getting married is a means to legalize the relationship between a man and a woman. A man is forbidden from having a relationship with a woman who is not a mahram without a clear reason. In one verse, Allah forbids us from approaching adultery, because adultery is a very bad act. Approaching adultery alone should not let alone commit adultery, certainly more prohibited. The Prophet Muhammad also reminded us of approaching this adultery. He forbade a man to be alone with a woman who is not a mahram because surely Satan will tempt to do things that are forbidden. By marrying a man and woman’s relationship becomes lawful. After marriage men and women become mahram, they are free together everywhere, except to places that are forbidden, of course.
As I told you before, I got married on Sunday 12 April. Within a month or so of the first time I met the girl, I decided to marry her. Without dating and not much communication, let alone meet her. From the first acquaintance to before marriage I only met the girl twice, those were when I was acquainted and when I applied. I got married at the girl’s parents’ new home, a house that had just been built, a house that had never been occupied before. The wedding program was very simple. I went to the wedding venue with my family group on Sunday morning from home. There were my parents, my sisters and other families. The distance between my parents ‘house and the girl’s parents’ house was about 100 km. There was an event that was not heartening when traveling. I chose the wrong road, got into a dead end, was forced to turn back to the original road. Understandably, I haven’t memorized the way to the girl’s house. Finally, I arrived at the girl’s parents’ new home. A small, simple house, so it cannot accommodate a large number of guests present. The solemnization of marriage (ijab kabul) went smoothly, thank God. It was at the time of the blessing that I really saw what the girl was like, beautiful, masyaaAllah.
Sunday, April 12, at around 10 am, I officially became a husband. The dowry was a book, as the request of the girl. Alhamdulillah. The program was over, my family’s group had returned home, but many guests were still present until late in the afternoon. After delivering my family’s entourage, I returned to my new family. It felt strange, awkward, confused. Because only a few people I knew. Even with my own wife. The foreign woman who is now my wife. The moment of the first night I was still awkward, sleeping with her. I couldn’t sleep until morning. Then what did I do with my wife? We just chat, got to know each other. That was all. Really didn’t know what to do.
How about your first night?